Thursday, February 01, 2007

Cabbage soup and Chihuahuas

Have you ever seen an old woman who closely resembles a chihuahua squeal?
Well if its someone like ahem... i'll call her Aunt-Chi - thats what my little cousin calls her, but I'm sure she means "auntie" not aunt chi(huahua), like me - all you have to do is wear jeans and a tee. I swear.

Okay she used to be this fat *extends arms wide enough to accomodate a baby elephant* and then suddenly, one fine day, i see a splinter-thin woman, who claims to be Aunt Chi. I being an innocent 14-year-old i think, at that time, simply shouted "IMPOSTER!"

Okay yes, it was her. She went on a super-fast-weight-losing-cabbage-soup-diet and Voila! Lost about 30 pounds. It is reported that her mother-in-law almost died of shock. One day she had bade farwell to a baby ellie Aunt Chi (with relief) and three weeks later (its fashionable in Karachi to meet your 'In-laws' once in a blue moon)she saw the New and Improved Aunt Chi. In case you're wondering I named her, after the Major Diet Plan. She looks like a chihuahua now. Swear. Its not even funny anymore.

Yes, back to the jeans-and-tee story. She squealed like a mouse who'd just seen a gigantic cat with eight paws and two heads.

But sadly, much later I found out that she squealed because the tee was so tight, one could see rolls of fat on my cousin's tummy. That scared her. Her worst nightmare must be being force-fed cake! So all my plans to wear the shortest, top I had with my jeans, just to make her squeal, failed! :(

Oh I know! I can tell her Greens are fats in making...They actually show on your tummy after 2 years!
It might just work..
We are talking about a freak here!